One of my most favorite things to do in my down-time is grab a bowl of popcorn and watch a chick-flick.
I mean, who doesn’t like a good ole romance about a damsel in distress being swept off her feet by a knight and shining armor? Or, even better yet, the damsel saving the knight!?
Unfortunately, there is one incredibly unfortunate theme I have watched take place over and over again in this film genre.
What is the one thing that makes a good chick-flick? The leading male and female falling in love despite the odds. Unfortunately, all too often, while the leading couple is falling in love (often unbeknownst to them) they have the person they are actually dating left in the background foundering.
The most unfortunate part of it all is that we, as the willing viewers, condone this by saying “Well, he doesn’t treat her right” or “he’s controlling and abusive” or “She is way too prissy and mean”.
Now, I want to make it clear, I DO NOT in any way, shape or form support any kind of abuse, but if a person is in an abusive relationship, they need to seek help from a family member, pastor, counselor or even the authorities, not through an extra relationship with another person.
It’s so super-duper easy to dismiss the events we’re watching because “it’s only a movie” and that’s just it, it is just a movie. The movies make it look so innocent that we, the viewers, start to make excuses for this behavior by thinking, “Well, they’re not actually dating. They’re just friends who fall in love…” I would like to counter that by arguing that while they may not be physically “dating”, they are most certainly emotionally dating.
Look at the way the leading lady and her knight are always in constant emotional turmoil over themselves, their real boyfriend/girlfriend and each other.
These youthful, lustful desires that are displayed are not only going to lead to immense pain for one-or all-involved, but it’s also morally wrong. The movies might make it look like fun. A rush of emotion here, a stolen kiss there, but what we are failing to see is that in amongst these rushes, are lies woven into lies. The leading lady lies to herself that there isn’t anything going on-thought there clearly is-lying to her boyfriend that there isn’t anything going on and making excuses for what’s going on like “it’s just work” or “he’s helping me with (fill in the blank)…”
Ladies, in reality, we are called to a much higher standard. We are called, not only to walk away from these desires, but to flee from them;
“Run from anything that stimulates youthful lusts. Instead, pursue righteous living, faithfulness, love, and peace. Enjoy the companionship of those who call on the Lord with pure hearts.” 2 Timothy 2:22
“But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do.” Galatians 5:1-17
Emotions are fickle and change from day to day-even from moment to moment-and we can’t be led by them. Following our emotions can lead us into all sorts of bad places and/or situations.
I can follow my emotions and eat a big piece of chocolate lava cake with vanilla ice cream everyday, but that doesn’t make it right or good for me. Doing something like that can lead to being not just over weight and unfit, but could lead to worse circumstances like diabetes.
God created our emotions to be used in tandem with the leading of his spirit. Through prayer and seeking, we can see if what we feel in our emotions is from him, or if it’s a fleshly desire that will lead to ruin.
The glorification of cheating and adultery that is so willingly watched is, quite frankly, frightening. So many young women watch this take place over and over and over again and eventually start to think that this is the way life really is. That it’s okay to be dating one guy until they find another guy they like better, and then sneak around and become emotionally and, unfortunately, sometimes physically, involved with someone they aren’t already in a committed relationship with. No amount of ‘buts’ and ‘what if’s’ can change the fact that this is in fact cheating-and the fact that we as christian women stand by and so willingly watch this-and even start to condone this kind of behavior is appalling.
Ladies, we are called to a higher standard. Not only in action, but also in what we put into our minds and hearts. These movies may be fun and entertaining, but when a person starts to watch these movies for an extended period of time, it starts to transform the way they think and act and conduct them-self.
“Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.
Ever hear the old term “what goes in, must come out”? This is what happens, when we start to glorify-or even just condone-this type of behavior. Eventually-in some form-those thoughts and ideologies are going to start to seep through into our everyday lives.
Dear sister, you are called to be set apart from the world, and sometimes that means having to give up-or at least start to clearly review and vet-what we are putting into our hearts and minds.
“You have been set apart as holy to the Lord your God, and he has chosen you from all the nations of the earth to be his own special treasure.” Deuteronomy 14:2
There are so many good movies for us to watch without having to sacrifice.
Here are a few of my favorites:
- Princess Cut- A story about a young woman trusting and waiting for God’s timing to bring the right man into her life.
- Old Fashioned- A story about a young man and woman overcoming their personal thoughts and pains about/from dating to embark upon a good old-fashioned courtship.
- One Night with The King- The story of Queen Esther, with the twist that each contestant gets to spend “one night with the king” (in actuality it’s either an afternoon or evening), to test their compatibility. Esther (obviously) wins the Kings heart and they marry and then Esther saves the Jewish people from annihilation at the hands of Haman.
- Love Comes Softly- The story of Marty, a young pioneer woman whose husband dies, and she soon-after must marry a young widower with a young daughter with the so that she has a place to live over the harsh prairie winter with the agreement that if she is a sort-of mother to the young girl-teaching her how to read and just letting her be a kid rather than having to help look after the farm-that he’ll pay for her to make her way home back east on the wagon train in the spring. Over the course of the winter, they fall in love…I’ll leave the rest of what happens a mystery!
Well, that’s all for now, lovelies!